deepest fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Quote by: ~ Marianna Williamson

my deepest fear is getting into a car accident, , i cringe when i think about it and sometimes have a hard time talking about it, such a stupid thing to be afraid of, im even more afraid of it then spiders and i hate spiders, but i have never been in a car accident, and all you hear is terrible things about car accidents and i cant ever imagine being trapped in a car while..kay never mind i have to stop talking about it now...my other fear is failure..i am so afraid to fail that i don't even try, which is bad because i cant keep avoiding things in my life because i am afraid to fail, what if i don't then great, but what if i do, i know the answer to that is try again, but im scared to take the leap of faith sometimes.

mollie

Standing Still.

Right now I am loungin in time. Nothings really happening. What does happen just is. It wont affect nothing. No change for the better or worse is going to happen. Well, thats how i feel about things right now anyway. There are thing that I dont understand and I have questioned but I still dont know what to do. I have prayed about it and sought prayer. I've spoken to people and listened and learnt yet still i cant do it.. still God has not answered me. So..i come to the conclusion as this. Right now I need just to be patient and continue on with the decisions that I have already made, and the ones of which I cant.. in due time God with decide my path..or i should say he will reveal it to me, and for the time i wait..I will just be. I will just Stand Still.

mollie

opinions anyone..

Hey peoples..hows it..I'm alright..don't got much to say..well nothing to say actually..just want to share something i just read...


Faith and Freedom

Grace...incites us into life--a life that goes on and on and on, world without end.
Romans 5:21, The Message

We are not free from failure. We find that the good intentions of our parents have not always worked out for the good...We find that our teachers were not always honest and that our minds therefor have distorted and inadequate ideas...We find that we want to be good, to be whole, and that we are not...We realize we are not free for what we want most of all--to be complete.
We are free to do many things. We are free from many restrictions. But what about the center? What about God? There we live in faith and failure, by faith and forgiveness, by faith and mercy, by faith and freedom.


So that's what i read today..well actually it was suppose to be for tomorrow but the title caught my eye so i read it..I'm not quite sure what it means but i have a bit of an idea..let me know what you think..I'd appreciate it.

Always, mollie-ann

a great start to a good day..

Yesterday was Sunday February the 18th 2007. Yesterday was also the day we set up for the aids benefit for orphans in Zambia. Along with that was vision night where we worship and take communion. Well how about i just tell you about my day from start to finish, well here we go...

Me, Jonny and Ashley slept over at Deanne's. So i got up at 9:15 am, we had to leave there by 10:00 am that was the goal so we would have enough time to go and get Heather, get something for Jonny to eat, and stop at my house so i can let the dog out and change, then be at the church bye 11:05am. So we left the house by 10:15 which wasn't so bad because Jonny is good on time when he needs to get somewhere. I think we got to the church at like 11:04 or something so it worked out. The service was good, i love my Pastor. God does good things with that man. The worship was great, so was the service..great start to a good day. After the service we had lunch together as a family, there were about 50 of us. After we ate is when the set up began, we had people finishing the ten, people setting up stuff on the wall, people directing, people supervising, people helping other, people watching the kids, some people just ate, people making vines, people making leaves, people helping, it was all really amazing. One big family, everyone was getting along and everyone was just together.

Me and Heather were running around the place at one point trying to hide from each other, but i kept finding her..it was quite fun..hey nuk..I WIN!!

After the set up was all done and everything was clean and put back into its place we had vision night. It all just went together so good..So we did some worship PA spoke a little, then we watched a movie on Mother Teresa..WOW i do not even know how to respond to the thing that this one woman did. Its just amazing, I definitely recommend that people watch this movie. If we had more people on earth like her, man this world would be such a better place. A woman after Jesus' own heart. I even cried. So many thing she could have used as an excuse to just give up and stop trying but she never did she had Faith in God. Did what she knew was right, what she knew God was telling her to do. She listened to God and obeyed. She was a good and faithful servant.

What did i get out of it. I want to be like her. I am in some ways but not even close. I have confidence to do the things i never thought i could do. I know that if one lady, one girl who listened could do so much than what can i do. What can i do for the world i live in. How can i please God and make him proud of me? How can i make a difference. How can it be done?
I know i can do anything with the power of God and if God not interested in it it wont happen, but if he is it will. That's one thing i learnt form the movie last night.

From this day forward i am going to do my best to do everything i n my power to do right, and when i cant do it i will do everything in his power because i know with God all things are possible. I have people who love me and are willing to help me, people who want to see me succeed and do well in life i need to just listen and DO IT.

Saturday i mucked up again and didn't make some people proud, well to those who know what i am talking about i am so done, finished, i know i have said it before, and you don't have to believe me but seriously i am so finished its not even funny. i know i can do it now, i know what i am going to say if the opportunity arises, i know what i have to do and i know that i have to do it if i want to be anything like Mother Teresa was. I am not saying that i am going to be just like her but i just want to fulfill God will for me. I am going to start listening to him rather than trying to figure it out in my head on my own because it doesn't really get more no where, sometimes yea i get places but i just slide back into my little rut. I don't want to stand in the muck and more i want to be back on solid ground, and what better day to start than yesterday, right. Great start!

I have a feeling things are not going to get easy for me any time soon because Satan is trying so hard to win me and i know he is not going to give up anytime soon. I am ready for it though, i know it is not going to be easy, but do i really want it to be. What the point if its too easy, wheres the challenge, without the challenge there is no lesson and i want the lesson because i want to learn and grow and love and just be. But for His will not mine. I want to hear the words, well done my good and faithful servant when i stand at the gates of Heaven.

Well i need to go for a shower and get ready for my first challenge..going back to work..ill let you know how it went, until then

God bless

always your friend, mollie-ann

I could kick myself..rolled up newspaper will do just fine

Holy man did i muck up big this time..seriously..I'm not going to talk about it and explain what happened because well really the people who need to know already know. I disappointed some people and hurt some people..i angered and upset some too.

I let things just build, and build and i didn't do nothing about it. I got scared and i froze. People tole me what i needed to do but i kept letting my pride come first. It only made things worse. The last few day i have not been able to sleep right or think right. Everything bothered me, and i noticed it had a toll on a good friend of mine and that bothered me more than all of it. I honestly didn't know what i was going to do..i needed to find a new job and i was worrying about rent and what people were thinking of me..i kept feeling like God wouldn't talk to me, but what more could he say to me really, nothing i already new, and nothing he could tell me unless i found out for myself..nothing felt right..things were uneasy and out of place and it just was not right..i needed to fix it but i got scared and didn't listen to the people i should have been listening to..in the end they were 100% right..so finally this morning i listened and put my pride aside and did what i had to do..and what happened..nothing..i still have my job so i can pay rent, immediately it felt like there was this huge burden just lightly lifted off my shoulders, i could have cried, i was so happy things were going to be okay..i mean i had faith in God that things would be okay i just didn't know how..man let me tell you this is one mistake i am never going to make again..I'm still going to get a spankin for this one next time they see me..<hmm not if i hide> no way ill take my dues this time..

so now that this is out and those of you who don't know what happened are clueless now here what i learned..........


I learned that i need to take action on the things i have done, don't let them just sit there and build until the point where you are stressed to the max, can't sleep, cant not think. Do something about it asap because if you do things will not be so bad. Don't let pride get in the way..ever! Don't think that people wont understand because you will be surprised. When people tell you to do something listen to them. Not all people but the ones you know you should be listening to..the ones who love you and care about you enough that when something happens to you it effects them too. DON'T EVER LIE.. It gets you absolutely no where, you feel guilty and sad and mad at yourself because you know it hurt the other person. Have faith in God in everything you do, just because you can't hear Him does not meant He is not there, he is just waiting for you to correct your mistake so you can go on again, and so He can continue to do the things He has set out for you. Never try to be the hero, its good to help but make sure you are not helping them too much to the point that you don't even notice you are the one who is in need. Pray more, read your bible more and do it with friends too. If you don't understand something learn it, work through it. If you are scared, don't be.. just have faith and DO what you are suppose to do. If there are problems don't run from them, face them. When all else fails,try again and try harder!

These past few days i have not even been able to blog my thought were so all over the place. I tried but nothing worth publishing you know what i mean. Well i don't know what else to write right now, all i know is that i am so grateful and thankful that i have people in my life who love me and don't give up on me. I have friends who care about me and give a crap weather or not I'm down and out. I need to learn how to push my pride aside when it is getting in the way. And even when I think I'm right i need to listen to my mentors because they are telling me things for a reason, and its to help me not take me out. Lady..thanks i love you and am so grateful that you and you family is in my life..I'm so blessed.

just trying to be a good and faithful servant

always, mollie-ann

hey guys..dont worry im going to post a blog soon..its just not the right time yet..


NEW BLOG COMING SOON!!!

-Mo

set me free by casting crowns

It hasn't always been this way

I remember brighter days

Before the dark ones came

Stole my mind

Wrapped my soul in chains



Now I live among the dead

Fighting voices in my head

Hoping someone hears me crying in the night

And carries me away



Set me free of the chains holding me

Is anybody out there hearing me?

Set me free



Morning breaks another day

Finds me crying in the rain

All alone with my demons I am

Who is this man that comes my way?

The dark ones shriek

They scream His name

Is this the One they say will set the captives free?

Jesus, rescue me



As the God man passes by

He looks straight through my eyes

And darkness cannot hide



Do you want to be free?

Lift your chains

I hold the key

All power on Heav'n and Earth belong to me



You are free

You are free

You are free



hey guys..this is set me free by casting crowns..
currently one of my favorite songs
i am definatly a music loverso i usually
tend to find things in common with my life
through the lyrics of a song..this one is
currently me..if you would like to check
the song out without downloading it you
can just click on the   "myspace" link on
the right of the screen and it will take
you to my personal myspace..the song will just play

well goodbye for now, always mollie-ann